Marrying My Non-Catholic Online Girlfriend
I have met a wonderful person online who I am thinking of marrying. She currently is not Catholic but appears to be open to becoming Catholic. She does not have access to an RCIA program. We currently live about 1000 miles apart.
I want to make sure that we marry in a manner that is most appropriate to the teachings of the Church. If she lived here, she could go through RCIA. But premarital cohabitation is obviously not an option, and it would be financially impractical for her to get an apartment for herself here. She has a young daughter, so having a roommate isn't an option.
My thought was to obtain a civil marriage when she moves here, have her go through RCIA and become Catholic, then get the sacrament of marriage from the Church. Is this an acceptable approach?
QUESTION from Jay on June 12, 2004
ANSWER by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM on June 13, 2004
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Dear Jay: I am happy to hear that your wife-to-be is interested in becoming Catholic, though I do not understand her not being able to go to RCIA in her area. She can check with any Catholic Church in her area. RCIA is also not required; one can ask for private instruction. As for your question there is no difference between cohabitation and getting civilly married outside of the Church. In fact cohabitation is a "lessor" sin that getting civilly married outside of the Church. In either case, you would not be married in the eyes of God and the Church, you and she would be living as concubines. In such a state of sin, you will be risking your soul and would be barred from receiving the Eucharist. Bottomline: you CANNOT do this. You will need to find another way. We will be praying for you to find a moral solution.
God Bless, |