Was a spell cast on me? Was this all Satan's work?
I am recently born again, after an affair that I had with a man who was a Satanist. I grew up in an Assembly of God Church, but grew apart from God as I became an adult. I recently ended a three year "affair" (we are both married) with a man that is a card-carrying Church of Satan member. At the time, this didn't bother me, but during the course of my relationship with him, I underwent extreme financial, mental and spiritual deterioration. I was wondering if Satan will embody someone, or use someone, specifically to get to you to lead to your downfall?
At first I was not attracted to him, in fact, i found this man grotesque. He weighs well over 400lbs and was quite slovenly. He was not well liked in the office, in fact most people found him rude, selfish and obnoxious, but I seemed to see something good in him no one else did. However, right around the time I found out my husband had had an affair, this man made sexual advances towards me. At first I was mortified and repulsed, but within about 24 hours of the first advance, I found myself overcome by the most irrational and intense feelings of sexual desire and lust I'd ever felt. I suddenly wanted this man more than anything, ever.
He then began telling me he had all of these other feelings for me that were more serious, but when I began to reciprocate, he would back off and turn very cold. Then, when I wanted out because of the way he treated me, he would tell me exactly what I wanted to hear (like most men in that situation would!) and eventually, I found myself completely obsessed with him, and I am not normally like that.
He was also into very bizarre sexual acts, that I normally did not engage in, but suddenly I was extremely turned on by all of it, and the more deviant and out there, the better! He also began figuring out how to manipulate me to feel sorry for him and take care of him financially, and I ended up loaning him a couple thousand dollars, some of which he used to tattoo a baphomet and pentagram on his chest. He never made any effort to pay me back, even though he knew at one point I was in a desperate financial situation.
He would read from the Satanic Bible to me and encouraged me to read many of Lavey's works, told me I was his soul mate and that he loved me...but he would play these awful mind games where he never had time for me,he would ignore me unless it was convenient, would never reciprocate any gifts...not even a birthday or a christmas card...everything totally centered around him.
In the meantime, I became increasingly depressed, my drinking increased to where I was drunk all day everyday, i developed a vicodin habit to try and ease the pain, I was fighting constantly with my family, my husband lost a great paying job suddenly, and I lost my job-twice, with two different companies. we went from over six figure incomes to living off less than minimum wage. I was hell bent on divorcing my husband, but he has stuck by me, trying to make it work. I ended up with two DUI's, and eventually served almost 90 days total in jail on both of them. My former life as I knew it was destroyed. I have lost my savings, almost lost my home and cars, and have demolished my credit. I have burned all my bridges within an industry I once was very respected in. Also,My daughter's grades slipped, she started drinking and having underage sex...behavior very different than before. It just seemed like from the moment he expressed interest in me, I wasn't the same.
My thinking was erratic and impulsive, and I frequently felt like something else had taken over the steering wheel of my life, and was driving me over a cliff. Do you believe this is all coincidence?
This man has bragged about destructive spells he has cast on others, like his ex-wife and her family, to cause sickness. Recently, i had a very vivid dream where I played out all of these circumstances, kind of like a movie- and in the dream, God was telling me that this man was Satan, and he had come to destroy my life like a tornado...and I had let him in, and I needed to stay away. But the weirdest thing is, although I know how evil and toxic he is, I cannot seem to shake the weird lust I have for him.
Do I just need psychiatric care, or do you believe this is spiritual warfare? (Sorry this is so long, I just wanted to give a good synopsis of the situation! Help!)
QUESTION from Daphne on June 10, 2004
Of course he was going to leave his wife, but only when it was good for him, although he pushed for me to separate from my husband and move out on my own.
ANSWER by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM on June 11, 2004
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Dear Daphne: You have certainly gotten yourself into a pickle. We first need to identify how this all came about. It came about because you committed adultery. All the rest stems from that grave sin. Without any influence from a Satanist, committing such a major sin as adultery, all by itself, will invite the devil to come into your life. First, you need to admit your sin of adultery and come before God with sorrow in your heart and repentance in your soul to ask forgiveness of this sin. This includes apologizing to your husband. You need to do all that is necessary to re-establish the marital bonds and love. Professional marriage counseling may help in this regard, but I would recommend a Christian counselor. Second, you need to sever completely, totally, and immediately any and all contact with this man who is a Satanist. No matter what your "feelings" are, you need to exercise self-discipline and NEVER speak to or see this person ever again. This is CRITICALLY important both in terms of being serious about repenting from adultery and, most importantly, in terms of the spiritual warfare that is taking place in your life right now. Third, you need to pray daily prayers to break curses and spells, prayers to gain back the ground you gave over to Satan by your sin, Hedge prayers of protection for yourself and your family, prayers asking God to remove from you any and all demonic spirits (i.e. spirit of lust, adultery, etc). These prayers can be found in the Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog linked below. Since you are not Catholic those portions of the prayers that refer to Mary or the Saints you can omit if you feel uncomfortable with them, but frankly you need all the help you can get. Our brothers and sisters in heaven are ready to help you. The reason these prayers need to be daily, at least for a while, is due to the possibility of this satanist and his friends could be cursing and/or casting spells on you and your family. Fourth, begin living a good Christian life. More than that begin living a victorious Christ-Life. Fifth, see a professional counselor, if needed, to sort out your life and regain good habits that will help to avoid sabotaging yourself on the job or in your family. If you want freedom from these things you must do all five things I have listed. By your adultery, and by committing adultery with a practicing Satanist you have essentially opened the gates wide open and have called out to the devil, "Hey, Mr. devil, come on in to my life." Now, you must bear the consequences of your actions, clean the house of your soul, kick out the devil from your life, take back the ground the devil took from you, close the gates to the Hedge of Protection, fill all the holes in the hedge, and start living a Godly and devout life.
1) Can Satan embody someone, or use someone, specifically to get to you to lead to your downfall? Yes, he can..... but you did a good job of that all by yourself. Nevertheless, the intensity and the specific nature of what has happen to you suggests that the demonic harassment is coming also from this man's involvement in satanism. In addition, especially in sex, there can be a transference of a demon from the one demonized to his sex partner. All of these sources I believe is contributing to the severity of attacks and experiences you are having.
No, I do not. The situation you have described fits perfectly with demonic attack and harassment as a result of personal sin and of possible spells and curses. 3) Do I just need psychiatric care, or do you believe this is spiritual warfare? Psychiatric care may be needed, but I also think, based on what you have said here, that spiritual warfare is a major source of the problems. Take the advice I gave you above. Also examine the self-help ideas in the HELP section of the St. Padre Pio site linked below. If you do not find improvement, then you may need the help of a Deliverance Counselor. We will be praying for you.
God Bless, For Assistance with Spiritual Warfare problems please go to our How We Can Help You page. For a direct link to sample Spiritual Warfare prayers see our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog |